Tag: mexico

You & I (and our baby)

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Couples with children often forget to separate some time for themselves to reconnect as partners.

Right on Livia’s six month birthday, we decided to take a little R&R at the beach in Puerto Escondido, Oaxaca to spend some quality time with each other, have some adult time with friends, and leave our little one in the care of my parents.

Let me tell you, I was so excited for this trip as I knew we could use some much needed time together, but I was also dreading leaving our baby for four days straight. I had just stopped breast feeding, so I was a little apprehensive about the whole situation and seriously felt she would forget who her mother was.

The moment we dropped her off with my parents I got teary eyed, but my hubby was super supportive and reassured me, as did my parents.

It is hard leaving something you love so much behind- but I also knew I had to take care of us as a relationship. Plus we weren’t going anywhere far and I knew my mom had been looking forward to taking care of her for some time now.

So now we returned from our travels and I can tell all new moms and dads one thing- rip the bandaid and take the trip. Yes, you’ll want to talk to your baby every day, but you’ll also get some much needed sleep and relaxation without having to worry about what time baby will be hungry or cranky. You’ll get to cuddle and sleep in, as well as have fun going out and getting pampered with a massage or two.

We had a great time together at the beach, spoke to Livia every day, and enjoyed ourselves.

One thing that I think is very important is that you need to put yourselves first as a couple in order to move forward as a family. Show your children how much you care, love, and respect each other so that they can learn to act the same way in the future. Strong together is better than strong alone because your messages and lessons will be more concrete and hold more stance in your kids’ eyes.

Yes, you’ll get occasional feelings of guilt for leaving your children behind, but it needs to happen for everyone’s sanity and to ensure that they are also used to being around different people. After all, who is going to stay around after you send your kids off to college? Your significant other.

(I will tell you, though, the moment I saw my daughter at the airport coming back from the beach, my heart exploded.)

A Different Set of Arms

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Let’s face it. We’ve all been here pre-baby- you are sitting in a plane minding your own business, getting ready to sleep or work when suddenly a person toting a baby sits right next to you and you think FML.

I am now the person toting the baby and thankfully she has been a blessing as she is a great traveler, except for this last time. Livia is six months old and the hubby and I decided to take our first vacation sans baby to Puerto first Escondido, Oaxaca and had to drop her off in Mexico City with my parents.

Everything was going perfect at the airport, until we got on the plane and she just got a bout of instant fussiness. She switched from arm to arm back and forth between us, until all of a sudden a lady appeared out of nowhere and asked if she could hold her. Surprised, but in need of a much needed break, we said ok and she stood there rocking my daughter (who to everyone’s surprise, calmed down and started laughing). We were shocked.

I remember my mother telling me that sometimes babies need a different set of arms. We sat there on the plane talking to this lady for about 40 minutes and I remember thinking, god bless her. This different set of arms theory works! Babies do feel the parents’ energy and quite frankly, the hubby and I were feeling frazzled and exasperated. This lady approached us with good vibes and positive energy, and immediately turned my daughter’s mood around.

So my advise to those pre-baby travelers is, don’t be afraid to offer your help if you see parents struggling on your flight, smile, offer words of encouragement, and if you dare- offer to give them a break. You’ll probably get a polite, “no thank you,” but that will have an immediate impact on how the parents feel at that very moment in a pretty stressful situation.

Happy travels 🙂

The Evil Eye

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I was never hugely superstitious (but do come from a family that is) until Livia was born. Once she came into this world, there were red bracelets and ribbons all over the place- on her crib, in her car-seat, on her diaper bag, on her ankle. I was very guarded about who came near her and any time we would leave the house, she would have to wear a red ribbon. My house and her crib ended up looking like the love locks at Brooklyn Bridge, except these were ribbons.

For those of you that don’t know, Latina moms are very wary of the “Mal de Ojo” (the infamous Evil Eye). We learn from our mothers to protect our infants and children from over admiring glances and envious stares as this could lead to illness or bad luck. In order to guard against these maladies, babies are gifted “eye” or red colored bracelets, which the mothers very much appreciate as this is considered protection for the baby (I think I received over 10 bracelets, ribbons, and blessed strings).

Regardless, this leads me to a much greater point which is we would do anything to protect our children, even if it means tying twenty ribbons to each one of their tiny toes. As a previous sans baby adult, I would like at the “eye” or “hamsa” bracelets as something of fashion or to be work as a fad. As we become mothers, it is interesting to see to what degrees we will go to safeguard our children- from blessing the house, to getting them baptized, ensuring that no one steps into the nursery with shoes on, having them wear protective jewelry, or even signaling the sign of the cross on their forehead at night, we become fiercely protective creatures- not only in the way we act, but also come to embrace the things that we might have ridiculed our own mothers for. Why do we do this? Because you really don’t know what it is to love something more than yourself until you have created life.

We have no problem doing the things that harm ourselves as humans, but will do or believe anything in the world to ensure that our children stand safeguarded because we know the evils out there.

So more than anything, what are we really concerned about? Making sure our children are protected from jealous eyes or ensuring that they don’t make the same mistakes we make as adults?

Little by little, we all become our mothers.

As a note- my daughter still wears her eye bracelet. Not taking any chances here!

 

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Frida’s Nursery

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As a professional female executive, I’ve been wanting to write a blog for the longest time, except I would find excuse after excuse not to- I am too busy, I have too much work, I am too tired. To be honest, the problem was content. I had so many ideas and so many things I wanted to yell out to the world, but it was disorganized and really did not hold any true meaning to anyone, but myself.

Blogging is about relating, telling a story, organizing your thoughts into one clear message, something you want to say or express in a consistent basis. For the last three years, I have not been consistent in any way, shape, or form in my life. In the last three years, I have moved into three different homes, gone through a divorce, worked in two different companies, got engaged, found out I was pregnant, and gave birth to a beautiful red-headed daughter, Livia. For the first time in a very long time, I feel consistent.

I felt the need to start writing when Livia was born and I was on maternity leave. I thought, why not record my thoughts so she can read them, learn from them, or just have something to look back on when she is older? This time, content rushed through my head, but the message was clear. Using my daughter as my inspiration, I wanted to write about being a professional mother (cliche-sounding, I know), my experiences with my family, while including my Mexican heritage, and also find a way to relate to women like myself- ambitious and hard-working mothers who have gone through hardships, and want to be the best they can be for their family.

At this point, I needed a name for my blog, my product,  my message. My mother helped me come up with the name “Frida” while visiting her in Mexico. I could not have thought of a more perfect example of a strong, independent woman that portrayed my culture. I, however, felt like I still needed something else. Just today I came up with Frida’s Nursery. if you think about it, a nursery is a place where children are raised, a habitat for plants and animals, and a place of growth. Frida’s Nursery stuck and here we are, ready to take on a project I have been wanting to embark on for a long time.

To my daughter… “I love you more than my own skin.”
-Frida Khalo 

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